So ready for things to be back to normal

Things have been out of whack lately. After I wrote my blog about what I would tell my high school self, it really started to get me thinking. Do people really have the ability to change?  It's hard for me to write this post. Recently I started talking to someone in my past. Everything was different than it was in high school. It was like he was a new person. I wonder if I was just blinded though. Cause now the more I think about it, he hadn't changed. Or had he? I don't know. Can you really know a person? I feel like I am being so naive about all of it. I can see what he is doing, yet I can't tell him to leave me alone. I hate when he talks to me. It's kind of like a band aid being ripped off. There is something that keeps me there though. I can't figure out what it is. I tell myself that if he texts me then I wont reply or I will say some  comment to get him to leave me alone. I can't do it. Lately it had been getting easier. I was starting to finally heal because he wasn't talking to me. I told myself that it was finally time to let it go. Then last night he texted me. I felt so much anger and sadness, yet I also felt kinda happy. I just don't see how he can be so distant one minute, and then the next minute wanting to talk. It's such a whiplash.  Being a girl isn't all what its cracked up to be. So much confusion. I just can't make sense of it all, and everyone is telling me something different. You should forget him, or maybe give him space. Some say he might be trying to focus on his career, and others say he's just being ridiculous. I wish these feelings would just go away. Thankfully, he is leaving for boot camp in a few days. That gives me a while to focus on me. I kinda just want him to forget about me. It wouldn't hurt my feelings. It would help to move on.